Wednesday, May 29, 2013

What God Taught Me When I Gave Away My Cat

I'd always known that in addition to being omnipotent and omniscient, Yahweh God is also a loving God. There was no question in my mind of this, no matter what gritty and sorrowful, ugly things came my way. But I'd always struggled with the thought of God weeping. Is it okay to think such a thing? No one living knows what God looks like in His physical form, so that added to the difficulty of picturing Him crying. All I know is He's not an old bald man because aging and decay are human side effects from the Fall of Man in the Garden of Eden - God does not sin, is not mere flesh and bone and therefore does not age.

I knew He had emotions such as anger, joy, even regret - we're told in Genesis He "was sorry" He had made mankind before He gracefully saved Noah and his family from the Great Flood.
But did He shed tears when I hurt? Did He grieve in His heart when I strayed from Him?

I suppose, in my Clint Eastwood wannabe mind, tears and crying reflected weakness, which could never exist in an almighty and all-powerful God. But also, being omnipotent, God does not contradict Himself - He wrote through the apostle Paul in Romans 12:15, "Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep."

This past February, West Texas A&M University purchased the property on which my apartment sat in Canyon, Texas, with plans to turn it into a parking lot. All residents had until April 15th to get out. I couldn't take my cat, Catman Crothers, to Amarillo where I was moving. So, I had to send him back home to my mother with my friend Jake.

But I knew Catman Crothers would not understand, being an animal. He wouldn't understand why I was chasing him to put him in his carrier as he meowed in defiance. For the three hour journey back home to my mother, he would be confined to his pet carrier, in the dark, scared and wanting his human. As I sat him in Jake's backseat, I made a guttural sound and began babbling about the Chicago Bears - man-talk, you know. I walked back up to my apartment, tightened with the feeling I mustn't bust out bawling.

And the Holy Spirit told me, not audibly but you know what I mean, that God feels the same a lot of the time, but to a degree we can't begin to fathom. He allows us to go through certain trials, afflictions, and tests, changes in environment, employment, and emotion, for reasons we may not understand at the time - and may never understand until we get to His bosom in heaven - but they must happen.

Any parent who's ever left a crying child on their first day of kindergarten knows what I'm talking about. Hey, I know what it's like to have kids - I've had two cats.

We must also remember God watched His only Son die an agonizing death.

And through His Son's resurrection we are united with the Father, which must bring Him abundant joy, just as He must grieve when we stray from Him, defy His word, or deny He's even there.