Things Blowing Up is a young adult novel about a small town that's dubbed "the most depressing town in Missouri." The town is subsequently invaded by aliens seeking to study depression in order to cure an epidemic on their home planet. The story follows a group of teens and their troubled families as they struggle to survive the invasion. Things Blowing Up will be available July 21, 2025, from lulu.com.
Chapter 23: The Phenomenon of Sorrow
It was about
two o’clock in the morning when Adelia started screaming.
Everybody’s first thought was the aliens were sick of flexing in
the sky and they were coming in. But in the dim glow of the
nightlight I saw Adelia hanging onto Barry’s leg as he struggled to
climb the stairs.
He’d been
rummaging through Tumbleweed’s stuff while everybody slept, and
found a big pair of boots and an old flannel jacket. He was laughing.
For a second I thought him and Adelia were playing around. Then I
realized he had the shotgun in his left hand. Adelia hung onto him
like a pit bull and started pulling at the oversized boots he’d
scavenged.
The rest of
us jumped up when it finally sunk in through the grogginess what was
going on. Me, Dad, Mario and Dave went after Barry. Brenda pulled on
Adelia to get her away while the rest of us tried to wrestle Barry
down the stairs. I grabbed the shotgun by the barrel and struggled to
keep it pointed up. I noticed blood on the stairs. Dad’s bandages
were open.
Mrs. Pico
and Brenda finally got Adelia away from the fight, and Mr. Pico was
gingerly sneaking up with a pipe of some kind in his hand. Any other
time it would have been a little extreme, but Barry was completely insane, with superhuman strength and a shotgun. When I saw a stray
yellow capsule on the stairs, I lost my grip. We should have checked
his pockets or made him tell us if there were any other hiding places
for Tumbleweed’s dope.
As soon as
I lost my hold on the shotgun, a blast sent us all scattering as
plaster rained from the ceiling. Barry let out a loud, crazy giggle
and sprinted up the stairs. I felt paralyzed. It was that demented
laugh that froze me. It pierced through the intense ringing in my
ears as I lay there on my side, watching my friend, turned into a
giggling lunatic, disappear into the darkness above us.
Seeing
Dad’s blood on the stairs and on my hands must have snapped me out
of it. I forced my brain to cooperate in helping Mario and Dave carry
Dad down the stairs. His foot was a mess and his eyes were
practically crossed with pain, but he told us to go after Barry
before he got himself killed. So we bounded up the stairs as fast as
you can go when you’re in a daze and you can hardly hear. I never
realized before how much it affects your motor skills when your
eardrums don’t work.
We made it
to the Boggises’ living room as Barry was driving his shoulder into
the front door, trying to break it down. In his pilled-up excitement,
he didn’t realize the doorknob worked. When he saw me, Dave, Mario
and Brenda coming after him, he stepped back and blew a hole in the
front door with the shotgun. He ducked and plowed through it, making
it bigger with the size of his body.
The four of
us followed him. I don't think any of us thought about it. We just
rushed through the hole in the door. It was the middle of the night,
but I forgot when I saw everything bathed in red from the barrier.
Through the ringing in my ears I could somehow hear Barry’s crazy
laughter, but not the humming and throbbing of the ship directly
above us. There weren’t any potato gunners around this time to
distract it. But even if there were, I think the aliens were
determined to take somebody. When everything turned green, my
muscles, my intestines, everything that made up my being was pierced
with a thousand little pin pricks. I felt like a rubber band being
stretched as I began to float.
It’s
funny, how relieved I was to see Mario, Dave, Brenda and Barry
(without the shotgun) being pulled up with me in the sick green
light. It was such an agonizing and slow trip that I had time to feel
bad for being happy that I wasn’t alone. I shouldn’t have been
glad my friends were being abducted by aliens. I should have wished
they were safe on the ground. You think the dumbest things during an
alien invasion.
It turns
out the inside of a spaceship looks pretty much like they do in the
movies. At least this one did. Everything looked like it was made of
chrome, with panels of blinking lights and buttons and dials, and
there were clear wide tubes that went up and down from the ceiling,
maybe fifty feet above us. The circular room we were in was huge,
with lots of open space in the middle. Most of the gizmos and panels
were connected to the walls. If the entire ship was the size of a
mansion, this room was the fancy lobby.
I don’t
think any of us were afraid or even shocked. Of course this was what
the inside of the ship would look like. Being inside it now, after
everything it had done to us, it felt like another why
not? thing. We’d seen death lasers and
abduction beams. We might as well see the inside, and see the alien
beings who operated the ugly thing that destroyed our town. I just
wished I’d said goodbye to Dad. I had plenty of chances when we
were in the basement all that time. I could have just randomly said,
any time I wanted, in case something happens
to me, I love you. If there’s ever a reason
to tell somebody you love them, it’s during an alien invasion.
Mario had
the wherewithal to recite a Catholic thing (I think) while he gazed
around at all the alien technology. “If ye have received power over
me from the Lord, draw nigh and delay not, for I am ready for you.
But if ye have come at the command of Satan, get ye back to your
places and tarry not, for I am a servant of Jesus the Conqueror.”
I wished
Mario hadn’t said all that, or at least that he'd said it in
Spanish. The words rubbed off on me and I felt braver than I really was when the big tubes started glowing that familiar sick
green, and twelve literal otherworldly beings slowly descended from
someplace above. When their big reveal was through, the only thing
that really jarred me was how much they looked just like the way the
crackpots (at least they used to be
crackpots) always said they did. They sure gave weight to Mario’s
theory of a common creator, anyway. Humanoids about five-and-a-half
feet tall, with two legs, two arms, a big head with two huge black
eyes, a mouth where ours is, five fingers on both hands, and two short
bare feet with five toes each. I counted.
They wore
poshy red robes made of something that had a silver shimmery effect.
The only thing that was different from the movies and the crackpots
was their skin wasn’t green. It was a gross shade of gray, like old
organs you see preserved in formaldehyde. Their skin wasn’t smooth
or free of blemishes, either. That was what I noticed most. They had
wrinkles, spots, ruts, even a light layer of fuzz.
Barry was
the only one who was freaking out, but if he wasn’t high on pills
he’d have been as collected as the rest of us. He wasn’t afraid
or in awe at seeing an alien for the first time, but he was pacing
back and forth like a caged animal, or somebody itching for a fight.
It was a good thing he dropped the shotgun on the ground. He cussed
and taunted the dozen gray beings about everything from their robes
looking gay (his words, not mine) to how much of a coward it takes
to zap people to death from a big impenetrable ship. I don’t know
why the others didn’t tell him to shut up. I know the reason I
didn’t was because everything he said was true, and these beings
deserved to be told they were cowards in ridiculous costumes. Even if
it came from the spitting wild version of Barry who I didn’t know
and didn’t like.
When his
rant hit a peak, he screamed and rushed at the aliens. The rest of us
shouted at him to stop. It went as well as it could have. One of the
twelve intercepted him (with average human strength, not magical
powers or by manipulating gravity), and without uttering a sound or
changing their expressions they held Barry in place while one of them
reached into its robe and took out a syringe full of yellow liquid.
As Barry shouted every vulgar sixth grade insult that came to his
brain, the alien gently put the needle in his neck.
They didn’t
let him fall to the chrome floor. They just lifted him as gingerly as
paramedics would lift somebody with a broken neck and placed him on a
gurney. I hadn’t even noticed two of the aliens wheeling it around
the moment Barry rushed at them.
Me, Mario,
Dave and Brenda all clutched at one another’s arms as if to keep
the other from fainting or going after the gray things. When we
realized Barry was breathing, then snoring, we relaxed our stance a
little.
So far,
everybody, human and humanoid both, had played it cool, except Barry,
and he looked like he was fine, all things considered. He could have
easily been zapped to ashes with some space weapon instead of knocked
out with space drugs. The atmosphere was so quiet, the hum of the
ship almost comforting from the inside, that we weren’t taken aback
when the alien with the syringe started talking, and in words we
knew. Its voice wasn’t metallic and cold like the act
prudently warning. It was like somebody being
slow and overly careful with their words because they’re still
trying to get a grasp of the language.
“We
welcome you to our craft with charity and assurances of your safety.
On behalf of those of us you see gathered before you, and on behalf
of our commander, again we say welcome.”
Brenda
would be the first one
to get salty. “You’ve literally incinerated like a hundred
people. I wouldn’t call that safe.”
The
spokesman/spokeswoman tilted his or her head like it was thinking
carefully about a good response. “We certainly understand your
skepticism. We do not perceive it as a flaw on your part.”
“Oh, you
don’t think I’m flawed! Greeeaaat!” Brenda glared.
The alien
cocked its head again. It could apparently detect sarcasm, so it knew
it had to formulate some really smooth words if it wanted to charm
Brenda. “We assure you, you are perfectly welcome on our craft. We
have no ill intent toward you.”
There was
an awkward silence, just like we were all humans. Then Dave asked,
“what did you put in Barry’s neck?”
The head
alien put some extra sweetness in its voice. “It is the equivalent
of a basic sedative on your planet. Our studies show it is closely
related chemically to your Valium. Your companion will not be
negatively affected by the serum unless he suffers from a natural
allergy to it. Judging by his current state, this does not appear to
be the case. You can certainly understand our reasoning for
neutralizing him temporarily.”
Mario spoke
up. He had the priestly tone in his voice, times ten. “I understand
it. But I don’t understand why you’re sealing off our town and
blowing it to pieces.”
The alien
wasn’t cowed. “We assure you we had no malicious or violent
intent when we traveled to Earth. The unfortunate destruction that
ensued is regrettable. We hope all hostilities will cease as soon as
possible.”
Mario: “Why
did you come here in the first place?”
Alien:
“That question can best be answered by our commander, who will join
us presently.”
Dave: “What
are you, like the number two?”
Alien: “I
am, in fact, second in command of this vessel. Perhaps you would like
to think of me as the equivalent to the character Riker on your
episodic Star Trek
television series.”
Dave: “I
don’t watch Star Trek.”
Alien: “My
apologies. When we were gathering information about Earth and its
cultures, we discovered your species has an affinity for fiction
which addresses space travel and communication with planets, galaxies
and civilizations beyond your own. We found this fact could help us
to illustrate our mission. Thus, my comparison of myself to this
Riker.”
Dave: “He
sounds like you, Mario.”
Alien:
“Which of you is called Mario?”
Mario
raised his hand.
Alien: “And
which of you is called Brenda Boggis?”
Brenda: “How do you
know my name?”
Dave: “They
literally know about Star Trek...”
Alien: “We
have your mother and father figures in an isolation unit elsewhere on
this vessel. They are both unharmed and in good health.”
Brenda’s
face turned pale and her eyes got wide. No matter how many times I’d
seen her do it in the past couple days, it was still jarring to see
her face not set to scowl. Believe it or not, it was the first time I
ever noticed she has blue eyes.
“What did
they tell you?” she croaked.
Me, Mario
and Dave couldn’t help looking at Brenda. That wasn’t the normal
first question to ask when you find out your parents are alive after
they were abducted by aliens.
Alien:
“That, too, is a question best answered by our commander. Tiran is
here now, in fact.”
The giant
tube in the middle glowed green and another being descended from
somewhere above. It looked just like the rest, except its robe was
yellow, with a hood over its big head. I figured only commanders were
allowed to wear hoods.
“Greetings,
inhabitants of Earth.”
(It really
said that.)
I said hi.
Commander:
“I hope you do not find it condescending if I ask about your
well-being.”
The
commander’s voice was more pleasant than the others, but it still
spoke awkwardly and stiffly. The four of us glanced at each other,
trying to decide among ourselves if it was condescending for the
alien to ask about our well-being.
I finally
said, “you know. A lot going on.”
Commander:
“Certainly so. I trust Sila, my second, has conveyed our deepest
regret for the chaos that has ensued upon our arrival. It was never
our goal to destroy.”
Me: “Yeah,
he said that.”
Commander:
“That is pleasurable. I am Tiran. I was chosen by the elders of our
home planet to lead this expedition.”
Mario:
“Where is your home planet?”
Tiran: “In
view of current circumstances, we do not find it prudent to reveal
its name or location.”
Dave: “But
you find it prudent to start a war on another planet?”
Tiran: “We
do not agree with your sentiment that a war is taking place. We
simply found it necessary to defend ourselves, as we were attacked.”
Dave
started an angry retort but Brenda interrupted him. “Can I see my
parents?”
Tiran:
“Your mother and father figures have been most cooperative in our
examinations. They have been, in short, a delight with which to
work.”
The
commander sounded more and more like it was using Chat GPT to help it
talk.
Brenda’s
voice broke and rose at the same time. “What do you mean
cooperative? Did you
cut them open?”
Tiran: “We
did not perform surgery on those two particular humans. We must add
that we regret that our knowledge of surgical study on the human
brain fell short of our aspirations. You surely understand our
limitations, having no subjects on our planet with which to work. We
regret that we consequently had no choice but to destroy the five
humans on whom we operated previously.”
Dave: “So,
you get how that looked like straight-up murder. You killed all my
uncles in two seconds.”
Brenda was
shaking and her fists were balled up at her sides. “Did you operate
on my parents?”
Tiran: “We
had no need to do so. We have been able to study subsequent subjects
with a noninvasive ray that gives us abundant insight into the mind
of the human species. We rejoice, as this insight will be of great
value to our own race, who are, as you may have observed, somewhat
similar to your own in form and biology.”
Mario: “Why
do you want to study the human mind?”
I felt
detached from the whole scene, like I was just an observer watching
it on TV. I tried to think of something to say, some important
question, but I was afraid whatever I said would sound pointless. As
funny as it sounds, I wanted to be able to make an impression on
these things.
Tiran: “The
inhabitants of our planet have recently become sluggish, unable to
concentrate on their work. Many have developed an apathy concerning
their very existence. It is a completely new phenomenon. So we turned
to the nearest, most biologically similar civilization in our search
for answers and insight. This happened to be yours.”
Mario: “Do
you mean you’re only now discovering depression
on your planet?”
Tiran: “We
do not have many of the things on our planet which we have observed
on Earth. For example, we do not know war or poverty in the way you
know them. We saw these phenomena in extremes throughout Earth.
However, situations in certain places on this planet proved so
extreme we believed the humans in those places would prove too
dissimilar from our own cases of behavioral malfunction. It seems
evident that the plague which has swept our home is not as severe as
the one which ravages the more violent and impoverished parts of your
planet. For which we are grateful.”
Mario: “Who
are you grateful to?
If you don’t mind me asking.”
Tiran: “We
anticipated a question of this nature. In studying your planet, we
found a great number of your inhabitants yearn to know if there is an
intelligent being responsible for the existence of all life. You may
feel an affinity with us if we share that we, too, seek the same
answers on our own planet. Thus far, we have discovered no definitive
proof of such a creator, and the elders of our planet long ago put
these findings into our planet’s creeds and laws. However, our
inhabitants are free to continue seeking such answers, as long as
they do so as individuals, rather than as any corporate body.”
Mario: “Oh.
That’s...interesting.”
Tiran went
on. “We searched other parts of your world where melancholy, as we
found it termed in your literature, was on a level of severity
similar to our own. By this we refer to a condition that is
disabling, but without the violent chaos and social instability that
accompanies other places on Earth where the phenomenon of sorrow is
prevalent.”
Pay
no attention to the smoking city below, I
thought.
“We chose
the place called Berlitz, Missouri because the malady that affects
you is of the same acute form and character of our own, as, like you,
we have not descended into societal chaos. We are much like you. We
hope this raises your level of trust that we will take the utmost
care during these examinations.”
“Why
don’t you just study the...the things
on your own planet?” Dave asked.
“The
elders of our planet have established a strict but morally pure code
of secrecy as it pertains to exploring and curing this plague,”
Tiran said. “If our planet’s inhabitants knew we found the
situation so alarming it required such extremes, the emotional malady
would only become worse. This is but one example of the vast wisdom
and foresight our elders possess.”
“You mean
you can’t just snatch one guy and chloroform him so he doesn’t
tell anybody what happened?” Dave pressed.
“Such
deceit would be contrary to our integrity,” Sila the Second put in.
“We do not lie to our inhabitants, as none have asked if there is a
search for a cure.”
I finally
spoke up. “What if somebody did
ask?” I kind of dreaded the answer.
“There
is, on our planet, what you might equate to a proverb,” Sila said.
“‘It is only where there are questions that one will find lies.’”
“That’s
the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard” (Dave).
“What if
we refuse to do it?” I asked. “These exams, I mean.”
Tiran’s
voice was different now. I can’t call it urgent, but he spoke
faster, and definitely more firm. “The elders of our planet have
insisted this expedition, undertaken for the sake of knowledge and
exploration, must not be in vain. They would be extremely displeased
if we returned with no information of value. They are well aware of
the difficulty we have encountered thus far on this mission, and have
expressed much dissatisfaction. We ask you, humbly, for your
assistance.”
